As of November 5, 2008, when President Obama is officially elected into office, our company will install a few new policies which are in keeping with his new, inspiring issues of change and fairness:

1. All salespeople will be pooling their sales and bonuses into a common pool that will be divided equally between all of you. This will serve to give those of you who are underachieving a fair shake.

2. All low level workers will be pooling their wages, including overtime, into a common pool, dividing it equally amongst yourselves. This will help those who are too busy for overtime to reap the rewards from those who have more spare time and can work extra hours.

3. All top management will now be referred to as the government. We will not participate in this pooling experience because the law doesn't apply to us.

4. The government will give eloquent speeches to all employees every week, encouraging it's workers to continue to work hard for the good of all.

5. The employees will be thrilled with these new policies because it's good to spread the wealth. Those of you who have underachieved will finally get an opportunity; those of you who have worked hard and had success will feel more patriotic.

6. The last few people who were hired should clean out their desks. Don't feel bad, though, because President Obama will give you free healthcare, free handouts, free oil for heating your home, free foodstamps, and he'll let you stay in your home for as long as you want even if you can't pay your mortgage. If you appeal directly to our democratic congress, you might even get a free flatscreen TV and a coupon for free haircuts

(Shouldn't all Americans be entitled to nice looking hair?) !!!

7. If for any reason you are not happy with the new policies, you may want to rethink your vote on November 4th.

Lets have a round of applause for Leonid Brezhnev who took time away from activities "on the other side" to chime in on today's election.

John McCain was driving his "Straight Talk Express" bus home to Arizona when he got a frantic call on his cell phone from his wife Cindy. "Be careful, John," she warned him. "I just heard on the news that there's someone driving the wrong way on the highway." John replied, "There's not just one. There's hundreds of them!"



Q. Why is John McCain running for President?
A. It was at the top of his bucket list.



John Mccain is so old that he remembers when Joe Biden was bald.



John McCain is so old that he would break the Fountain of Youth.



Q. When does John McCain usually go to bed?
A. Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.



John McCain asked two questions when he proposed to Cindy. First he got down on his knees and asked her, "Will you marry me?" After she agreed John then asked her, "And can you help me get back up?"



Q. How do you spell the name of the next boss of the United States of America? John Mcain, John Macain, John Mccane, Jon Mccain or John McCain?

A. Cindy McCain.




At his last birthday party John McCain managed to blow out every one of the candles on his cake. Unfortunately, several of his guests had to be treated for wax poisoning.




At a recent press conference John McCain promised to protect the Social Security trsut fund and even showed the reporters his own card. It's number XXIV.




The Secret Service gave Bill Clinton the code name The Clap. John McCain is known as the Clapper.




Responding to requests for full disclosure, John McCain released over 1,500 pages of his medical records. That's really not as much as it sounds like. It's large print.




John McCain has been criticized by some Republican commentators for not being conservative enough. It didn't help when McCain drove the "Straight Talk Express" all the way across the country with its left blinker on.




Q. What did John McCain say when his plane was shot down over enemy lines?

A. Curse you, Red Baron!




Q. Why did John McCain take so long to release his medical records?

A. The archeologists had to find them all first.




Senator McCain was accused of inappropriate behavior with a female lobbyist 31 years younger than he is. That should get him Bill Clinton's vote.




Unlike other candidates in the Republican primaries, John McCain says he believes in the Theory of Evolution. In fact, he watched it happen with his own eyes.




John McCain was falsely accused of being spotted with a sexy blond lobbyist in a sleazy dress. It turned out that it was just Rudy Giulliani.




Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has endorsed John McCain for President. It's a case of a RINO endorsing a DINO.




John McCain recently fired a campaign aide after he asked for a Johnny Walker and the aide brought him a drink instead.





Q. When did John McCain decide that he believed in the theory of Global Warming?

A. Right after he got confused while adjusting his office thermostat and set temperature too high.




"The nice thing about Alzheimer's is you get to hide your own Easter eggs." --John McCain [actual quote]

That last one is kind of funny.

Thanks for the Obama "scare 'em Right" of the day David. Did you get your McCain action points? I hear they can be redeemed for signed pictures, or something like that.

Let us know k?

I really liked this one:

Q. What did John McCain say when his plane was shot down over enemy lines?

A. Curse you, Red Baron!

David, it sounds like you have no actual clue about Obama's real proposals for tax policy and health care changes.

Andrew

David's had a history of being wrong on just about everything he posts, going back to the beginning of the Iraq war. Simply put, he's a low info voter (and probably low education as well).

And the sad thing about all the tools that are crowing about "spreading the wealth", those folks don't have any wealth to spread!! They're just pathetic pawns in the annual attempt the GOP makes to continue tax policies that favor the rich and fuck the low info voters who are red in the face as they scream socialism. There is nothing worse than the voter who fails to see the light and vote THEIR best economic interests. But, they deserve what they get, which is why they have no wealth to spread.

I have thought it strange for many years now how a number of us baby boomer types especially, have admired the " Star Trek " franchise.

You know, the whole notion of a future full of no poverty, each person realizing or more able to realize their own potential in a world with essentially 'no money required' to live a full and fruitful life. Persuit of all things scientific, cultural, and of course the notion of exploration of the Galaxy, exobiology, alien cultures etc etc...You get my point here. Yes, it is fantasy, but as they say , from dreams come reality.

Now, most, if not all of us who like this franchise model are Capitalists to some degree or another, some Republican Conservatives, some soft Republicans, some Democrats, Liberals etc, but most of us are heavily involved in the " "American Way" so to speak. Interesting how people ( and that includes yours truly ) are reviled at the notion of Marxism, yet embrace a fantasy franchise that is essentially Marxism Ideally realized, AKA Utopian !

I believe that Marxism was embossed with the bloody intolerance of the Bolsheviks and the subsequent piracy of the ruthless Joseph Stalin and those that followed him over the last 80 years or so. So, when someone uses the term Marxist, it conjures up those evil repressive insane loathsome elements, which we could all agree are enough to scare the 'wadden' out of any sane person.

I think that eventually some smart person or party of persons will come up with another term for a compassionate, modernized and peacful system as I have described above that doesnt include any reference to Karl Marx or any of the bad guys also mentioned above.

Crane and Shore 2008

That's the Ticket i'd vote for!

David has joined my "I won't bother to post comments" group. His posts are so absurd as to be completely pointless. And they aren't even original. He's a "cutter and paster".

David drops in, drops a bomb that's usually a dud and then takes off and never comes back to defend his statements.
Typical EXTREME RIGHTIE for ya....

Good call Warner.

"Bomb throwers" you find on both the Left and the Right .

I think somebody put a stop payment on his reality check?

Cancelled for NSF.

Non Suffient Facts