To all you Mothers. THANK YOU!!!! Without you we all would be nothing. May your day be everything you want or imagine.

You beat me to it, Average Joe!

I hope all the Moms have an excellent day being even more cherished than they are every other day!

Happy Mother's Day to Mrs. M and Misskitty, and to all the wives who let you guys spend so much time with us!

Happy Mothers day Trixter.

You 2 Mc!
Hope your hysterectomy went ok last week....

Sheesh ladies, can't we all get along on even Mother's Day?

What did we all get/do for our mothers today?

Poor choice of humor trixter, A hysterectomy is no laughing matter.

But it makes everything better Marvin. 2 women in my family have had them and they thank God above for everyday that they did.
My wife is going to have it done now that we've had our last kid. She has endometriosis and a hysterectomy is a good way to get it to stop.
It's humor DIRECTED at Mc. We go round and round all the time....

This is my second Mother's Day without my mom. I miss her everyday. However celebrating the mother of my two kids has been great.

Our 15 year old daughter put together a wonderful handmade little storybook for my wife. I bought my wife a one hour massage and we enjoyed cheese cake from New Seasons.

Called a long time friend of mine who is spending his first Mother's Day without his mom who died just over a month ago. Just called to touch base. I know he appreciated it because of where I have been. It was good.

Yes indeed. Happy Mother's Day.

Glad you have some support in that.

My relationship with my mom has been just HORRIBLE. It's starting to get better each year, but it's a very long, slow climb. A simple phone call this year let us touch base. It was good.

This is the first time in 15 years I got to spend some of mother's day with my mom.

I made her eggs benedict for breakfast, her health is not good at all and she hasn't eaten anything of substance for about four days. She was well enough to eat, and I was happy to make it for her.

Just the thanks and look of content on her face made it all worthwhile.

Chris, my condolences. We don't realize what we have with our parents until it's gone ... I dread the day my mother goes, because we are so close.

Missing, keep working on that relationship. I had none with my father and when I found out he passed a few years ago, it set me back. I wish to hell to this day that I had a chance to do something with that.

Your timing is good. I'll take your advice.

It's going to be HARD WORK though. Both parents are so distant right now. Too much history, way too much history.

I want to just move forward. Maybe..

My father is not in good health either. Gonna have to have a talk. Thought about exactly what happened to you. It's ugly either way, but maybe it's uglier if nothing is done.

If for no other reason,do it to relieve *yourself* of any guilt,etc.

Once they're gone,they're gone.
Carrying it around with you for the rest of your life really sucks.Trust me.

:-(

The old adage "You don't get to choose your parents" seems to be in play here.

Missing my wife has loads of history with her parents too. Some of it is playing out even as I type this with one of their daughters having to move back in with them. She is 50 yrs old and going through a divorce.

You certainly don't have to be best frieinds or even like your parents that much to at least be civil. Only you know what buttons are the ones that really get things going.

I don't particularly want to see my in-laws but I have learned that I can be kind and have a listening ear. Listening can be the hardest thing when it comes to dealing with parents. You so badly want to say what's on your mind and let them know where they stand in your life.

I don't know the circumstances of your parents but I do know that being a good listener is hard work but beneficial.

I was very fortunate to be raised with parents that made each of us kids feel precious and cherished. Mom was rock solid, funny, and yet understated. She had a special relationship with my wife and daughter that you just can't define into words.

Dad is going strong at 81. He maybe around another 10 years or more. He's thought about writing another book. So many men in his age group re-marry less than a year after their spouse dies because they can't do the simple chores of living. They need a woman to take care of them. Then they marry the wrong person and their final years are unhappy ones.

My dad was always cooking, cleaning and washing the dishes along side mom. They really had a partnership of 55 years. It has certainly been my role model over our 20 years of marriage.

There is no magic potion, no wand you can wave that can right all the history you've been through. But you do have a choice, which is the one thing you do have control over. It all depends on how you choose to use it.

BrianL- Thanks for the condolences. I still can't believe mom is gone. You're doing the right thing for your mom and somewhere it's going count for something.

Thanks guys.

I made one phone call to Mom last night. First time in a while. It was good, so that's a start. Now Dad...

This whole mess just chaps my ass too. I'm really pretty darn good at working through stuff. All of our kids had major issues and we blew through those (well, slogged through, but we didn't care, so it's just perception right?) knowing all was going to be good.

With this, it just seems futile enough to just blow away my usual motivation.

Year two Chris. It gets better. From your writings here you had a good Mom. My wife did too. We miss her, as you do yours.

One thing that helps us is to carry forward some stuff she always insisted we did --and to make food she always wanted to eat. There are about 4 dishes we prepare regularly. The kids love them and she almost always comes up.

Those are not painful conversations these days.

Oh, and my younger daughter has Grandmas pillow in a sealed bag. She gets it out once in a while to remember.

Thanks Doug. Yes there are loads of memories of mom around our place. My wife is a constant reminder because she'll tell me how she dealt with one our kids and I'll tell her "oh that was just like my mom."

I'll find myself near my mother’s gravesite from time to time and make an unscheduled stop. I usually place some kind of small item on the grave stone that I think she would find amusing. It was a couple of pennies recently that I place in the "O's" on some of the letters.

Dad will let me know when he stops by the cemetery that those pennies are still on the stone and add a nice contrast.