Singer Sheryl Crow has said a ban on using too much toilet paper should be introduced to help the environment.

Crow has suggested using "only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where two to three could be required".

The 45-year-old, who made the comments on her website, has just toured the US on a biodiesel-powered bus to raise awareness about climate change.

She teamed up with environmental activist Laurie David for the shows.

The pair targeted 11 university campuses to persuade students to help combat the world's environmental problems.

I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting

"I have spent the better part of this tour trying to come up with easy ways for us all to become a part of the solution to global warming," Crow wrote.

"Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating.

"I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting."


David (left) and Crow have finished the Stop Global Warming College Tour
The tour ended on Sunday at the George Washington University in Washington DC, where Crow performed with Tim McGraw, Faith Hill and Carole King.

David's husband, Seinfeld creator Larry David, also appeared.

Crow has also commented on her website about how she thinks paper napkins "represent the height of wastefulness".

She has designed a clothing line with what she calls a "dining sleeve".

The sleeve is detachable and can be replaced with another "dining sleeve" after the diner has used it to wipe his or her mouth.

The shows involved a short set by the singer, a talk by David and segments of Al Gore's environmental film An Inconvenient Truth.

Oh No! It's happening!

"I couldn't possibly spare a square"

Elaine Benis


Sadly, I think all the energy (washer, soap, dryer) used to get the skid marks out your poo-poo undies would negate any benefits of her idea.

Green brain, brown hand!

And if she only needs 3 squares for a #2, someone here was right aboout her anorexia, oops, I just checked and sorry, that was Renee Zellweger on the "dead pool" thread.

I'm going to Target right now and stocking up now on 5-ply!

The History of Toilet Paper

* 589 AD: the first mentioning of toilet paper in China

* 851 AD: the first foreign source (Arab-Muslim) to confirm the use of toilet paper in China.

* Early 14th century: first records of the massive amounts of toilet paper manufactured in China.

* 1391: 720 sheets of toilet paper produced in China for the Hongwu Emperor's court, while 15000 special sheets were produced solely for the royal family. Sheets were approximately 60cm x 90cm.

* 1596: invention of the flushing toilet

* 1700s: newspaper is a popular choice of toilet paper, since it is widely available[citation needed]

* 1710s: the bidet invented.

* 1792: the Old Farmer's Almanac begins publication; there are several publications by the same name, as well as the Farmer's Almanac, which began publication in 1960. Pages from these publications were often ripped out and used as toilet paper, and later editions have holes punched in them so they could be hung from a hook in outhouses.[citation needed]

* 1857: Joseph Gayetty sells first factory-made toilet paper (Gayetty's Medicated Paper) in the USA. These were loose, flat, sheets of paper, pre-moistened and medicated with aloe; each sheet has Gayetty's name printed on it. It sold at five hundred sheets for fifty cents and was known as Gayetty's Medicated Paper - "a perfectly pure article for the toilet and for the prevention of piles." An advertisement for Gayetty's Medicated Paper can be found here.

* 1877: The Albany Perforated Wrapping Paper Company of Albany, New York sells Perforated toilet paper ('The Standard'). It is sold 'by all the leading druggists' and is not medicated. It is marketed as being free of 'all deleterious substances' which includes printed materials and chemicals 'incident to the ordinary process of manufacture (which is) a cause of hemorrhoids.' In addition, medicated toilet paper which is 'heavily charged with ointment' was offered for 'sufferers of hemorrhoids.'

* 1879: Scott Paper Company sells the first toilet paper on a roll, although initially they do not print their company name on the packaging. Toilet paper was sold under the name of various industrial customers, including the Waldorf Hotel, which led to the popular Waldorf brand of toilet paper.

* late 19th century: rolls of perforated toilet paper available for the first time, replaces razor or knife on dispensers

* 1900: plumbing improvements of the Victorian era have led to wide use of flushing toilet and (in Europe) the bidet

* 1935: Northern Tissue advertises its toilet paper as "splinter-free"

* 1942: first two-ply toilet paper from St. Andrew's Paper Mill in England; toilet paper becomes softer and more pliable. For most of the rest of the twentieth century, both 'hard' and 'soft' paper was common. Hard was cheaper, and was shiny on one side. Sometimes it had messages like 'GOVERNMENT PROPERTY', 'IZAL MEDICATED' or 'NOW WASH YOUR HANDS PLEASE' written on each sheet near the perforation. Eventually soft paper won out as the price differential between the two papers vanished. Hard paper is seldom seen these days in UK, but is still available.

* 1943: novelty toilet paper printed with images of Hitler

* 1973 December 19: comedian Johnny Carson causes a three week toilet paper shortage in the USA after a joke scares consumers into stockpiling supplies

* 1980: the paperless toilet invented in Japan (combination toilet, bidet and drying element, see Japanese toilet)

* 1990s: papers containing ingredients like aloe begin to be heavily marketed in the USA

* 2000s: toilet paper is commonly available in hundreds of different designs, colors, and prints.

* 2006: For the first time: 13 shades of colored toilet paper are sold on the web at frenchtoiletpaper.

* April 2007 Sheryl Crow successfully bans toilet paper sales to the bourgeois. Wearing an olive-colored Che Guevara T-shirt and Prada pumps she proudly proclaims from the steps of Laurie David's Gulfstream, "Let them eat cake."

* September 2007 The shit hits the fan. Jeffrey Skilling and Albert Gore, former "the next President of the World," indicted on toilet paper futures fraud, escapes to Switzerland, now living in Marc Rich's pool house. Paper offsets found out to be worthless. Billions of dollars of ill-gotten gains thought to be flushed down the toilet.

Hahaha! Good point, Mrs. M!

Perhaps she was bragging that she was very deft at one square usage and we should all be as skilled as she in using every space on that square and it is quite enough when used correctly.

Target? I go to Costco. TP is Costco's best selling item.

If Sheryl Crow uses only 1 square of toilet paper, two or three for the "messy ones", as she puts it, the only thing she's going to attract are flies.

Maybe she doesn't know the difference between TP and Bounty™, The quicker pooper picker upper.

Or baby wipes? Or NASA diapers? Wait, her pants are way too tight for those...

And damn her for selling out to Revlon (chemical hair dye?) and even worse, ruining "Not Fade Away" forever.

you poop what you eat . . . the more junk food you eat the more garbage (undigestable) that comes out. if one needs more squares, check the quality of your food intake.

True, but I don't know anyone who's a 3-square pooper, no matter what they eat. (Not that I've asked, or checked, or even counted the TP)

There's only 2 kinds of people in this world:

Crumplers and folders.

;=)

Maybe Cheryl just scootches across the shag rug like a hound dog with a dingleberry.

I really shouldn't make a joke that ends with, "when Larry David eats crow" -- whoops.

What about Laurie David? Wild stuff happens on tour, right?

Yeah, I muffed that joke.

Good save Mrs. Merkin. ;0)

...attracting flies!

This is freaking hilarious!

There is no way to get a 3 square number two done properly. NONE.

If the planet might burn, I'm still gonna make sure I wipe it all off. That means an extra hunk, just to check!

.... well, SHIT!

If Ms. Crow thinks that one little square of TP is going to properly clean my rather gargantuan backside, she has another think coming.

Sorry, I'm using more TP before I have to leave skidmarks in the Fruit of the Looms ... or lose a shirt ... or anything else.

Captain Kirk, can you read me! I've accidentally gone straight back to 4th grade on the transporter! Klingons circling Uranus! Send Lt. Charmin ASAP! Over!



(Bonus points to LS for the even better "muff"...you guys kill me on a daily basis)

When I first heard about this, I thought: this must be a joke. right? I'd be perfectly willing to support this lofty goal if Ms. Crow, Mr. & Mrs. David, and friends are willing to pay for bidets for everyone. Otherwise, I think that this is a class discrimination issue because po' folks who can't afford bidets will be the ones who suffer under this draconian TP usage limit.

Hey, this is a great idea.

It will end unemployment and get everyone off the welfare rolls.

It will also get the country out of debt.

They are going to have to hire tons of contractors to run sewer lines from everybody's house to the Turds-R-Us® plant and then hire thousands to sort thru the poo goo to count the numbers of sheets used with each flush.

There will be huge fines if you swipe with more than 1 square.

Sure....I can see it now. Cheaters will poop then wipe, flush, wipe, flush, and so on.

Forget it!!! The whole deal's off. I'm wipen till I'm clean. And I'm gonna squeeze the Charmin too!

Actually..I'd like to argue the "more junk food you eat" point.

My health-food freakism says otherwise.

Forcing a transition to bidets would greatly stimulate the economy! Think of all the new bidets that would have to be manufactured and sold. Also, think of all the work that installation of these bidets would generate for plumbers. Instead of having a sunset date on analog NTSC TV, there should be a sunset date on traditional toilets. After the Superbowl in 2009, traditional toilets will be disconnected, by government edict, from municipal water supplies. Your old fashioned toilet will no longer work. Only new combination toilet/bidet units will work after that date.

"Actually..I'd like to argue the "more junk food you eat" point.

My health-food freakism says otherwise."


So how does your poop smell on the odormeter? That's another indicator.

I'm a good liberal and believe in protecting the environment and all that, but, I will continue to use as much tp as I feel the job requires. Ms. Crow sounds juuuuuust a bit wacky here...

>>>"I'm a good liberal"

I learn something every day. I didn't know there was any such thing until now.

Because I'm trying to be a kinder, gentler Warner, I'm going to take that as your attempt at humor.

Okay so I attempted to use one square after lunch. Trying to think positively about it all.

I went through an entire bottle of antibacterial soap in the aftermath.

Would someone like to do a little research to see if Sheryl Crow is really a lobbyist ... for the bidet industry?

Update: She now admits it was a joke. I didn't think she was that goofy.

http://www.abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=3071833&page=1

>>>" I'm going to take that as your attempt at humor."

A wise choice as it was.

Isnt that the normal "out" when someone says something really stupid, "Oh, that was just a joke.".

Nwokie- That's what I always say to my wife!

This broad travels with something like 3 18-wheelers, 6 SUVs and a couple of other vehicles. Then, she lectures us on helping cut down on global warming by using a snipit of toilet paper. Where do these stars get off telling us stupid things we should do while they do 10 times the damage to the atmosphere as any one of us might.

Oh it was a JOKE? HAHAHAHAHhahahahahcough...hahaha..ahem.

Yeah. Not funny and extremely stupid.

Let me guess, she'll now go to rehab.

Deane, the busses and all are fueled by alternate fuel sources, fyi.

Alternative sources, like biodiesel, that takes more energy to produce, that it delivers.

Or takes away food, so food prices are higher like in Mexico?

Massive alcohol consumption

Non sparkling mineral - PREFERABLY NOT EVIAN. Yeech, she wouldn't be caught dead drinking that swill.

Marboro Lights and disposable lighters - so very environmental of her. Perhaps she should be limiting herself to NONE cigs?

Parking as near as possible to stage for 3 tractor trailers, 4 buses, 6 cars all for the good of the environment


http://www.thesmokinggun.com/backstagetour/scrow/scrow4.html


Oh I get it - this was just a joke! That Sheryl Crow, such a funny prankster. Who cares if Sheryl Crow, Al Gore and all of Hollywood faux environmentalists are hypocrites, as long as their message is trendy it's OK.

"Deane, the busses and all are fueled by alternate fuel sources, fyi."

Actually none of those buses used "alternative" fuels, they used nothing but good old 3mpg diesel.

Her diesel uses 80% diesel, 20% recycled vegetable oil, which used as much fossil fuels to produce on a gallon per gallon basis.

In other words, the 3 mpg that her new bio-diesel narcissism tour uses exactly the same amount of fossil fuels as her old fleet of tour buses did!

The only "alternate fuel source" that would make any sense would be for her to get her fat ass out of the bus and push it.

See my post from yesterday: my first reaction was that something this goofy had to done in jest. However, does Sheryl REALLY smoke Marlboros? That is pretty un-environmental because cigarette filters are not biodegradable. I think that a moderately self-respecting environmentalist would only smoke hand-rolled cigarettes and light them with a solar-powered cigarette lighter. Radio Shack used to sell such a gadget some 20 years ago: it was a parabolic mirror with a clip to hold the cigarette. A die-hard environmentalist would not smoke because of the secondhand fumes and the environmental impact of tobacco farming.

FYI: Sheryl Crow does NOT have a fat ass. Bitch.

At least she has good taste in bourbon. Makers Mark, yum!

I guess I can be considered a pretty hardcore environmentalist then.

I don't smoke. I cut through all the possible plastic pieces on six pack packaging. I recycle EVERYTHING. I don't eat meat. I ride my bike....except for today...I needed extra sleep.

Oh, and I quit a job just because it entailed so much driving.

And, I'd really like to see the sources saying that Sheryl's bus doesn't use alternative fuel. It's been all over the news, I call you to show me solid evidence (not just your personal spouting off) to back up otherwise.

Who cares really.

This is all just noise from those who would rather talk about anything but the issue. If they can make the messengers look bad, then they can ignore the message!

DJ..
And You've seen SC's fat ass??
WOW!
With all YOUR intelligence you came up with some BULLSHIT statement like that?
MIT???
IGNORANCE is.................. bliss.

NWokie- I've told you before, your belief that Biodiesel has a negative energy balance is incorrect and based on one very flawed study. A quick googling will give you all the info you need, but if you're interested in discussing it, we can start another thread.

Goreecoprofiteer- "Actually none of those buses used "alternative" fuels, they used nothing but good old 3mpg diesel.

Her diesel uses 80% diesel, 20% recycled vegetable oil, which used as much fossil fuels to produce on a gallon per gallon basis.

In other words, the 3 mpg that her new bio-diesel narcissism tour uses exactly the same amount of fossil fuels as her old fleet of tour buses did!"

Could you please explain, and/or provide a cite for, your very confusing statement above? Do the busses use only petroleum diesel? Do they use 80% petrodiesel and 20% Bio(or is it 20% veggie oil?) Are you claiming that they actually use biodiesel but the equivalent amount of petrodiesel is consumed creating the BD? Are you claiming that it takes 1 gallon of diesel to "recycle" 1 gallon of veggie oil?

(I won't be holding my breath on either request, but it would show that you have some sincere interest in the truth and aren't just practicing willful ignorance and/or trolling...)

Frontline had a decent program last night -

The Politics of Global warming. Basically it boiled down to " Question the science in public. Get enough doubt going. The economics are too unsavory for the companies that would have to spend it. They want more profits - at every cost."

And they are basically using the 1980's playbook from when big tobacco was having to answer for their deeds. " Question the science. Create the doubt. Lie."

The good news is that while it always works in the short term, it NEVER works in the long term. People come forward - admit they lied to protect their pocketbooks - THEN things change. Nothing new. We all know the game.

And we'll win.