What are your weird or crazy habits?

Back in my college days, laundry never got done often, mostly because I was too lazy to do it. When I would wake up in the morning before heading off to class, I used to do the sniff test on my boxers to see if they were clean or not. I would pick them up from off the floor and smell them, if they smelled fine I would put them on and wear them. THATS how I dedcided if they were clean or not.
Whats your crazy habits? And Don't tell me you never did the sniff test!

How about Cleaning your ear out with a car key!
My grandfather used to do it all the time, especially in public places!!

You might be redneck if you use your friends key to clean out your ear!

Keys work great to scratch an itch in your ear!!!

Skull caramel. Drives the ladies wild.

I'm the opposite habit, I must have clean underwear and wash my hair/shower every morning or I feel disgusting. I feel naked without earrings on.

And Ewwww, the ear cleaning is "tied" for ick-factor with people who clip their fingernails in public places, like church! Or following a "pocket change jingler" on a nice quiet tour through the Kennnedy Center. Grrrrr.

This could become a very long thread.

I also have a "thing" about people who do not make a habit of trimming nose hair.

Oh, Little, I just threw up in my mouth a bit while cracking up. You slay me.

Clipping your toenails at a public Restraunt. Oh yes, I was sitting next to Mr. Fungus foot at Who Song and Larrys last summer. He had the nerve to take his shoe off and start clipping away at his fungus infected toe nails. I couldn't help but watch him scrape all of the white Cheese from his toe nail. I seriously wanted to Barf. When My delicious Chimmy Chonga arrived I had lost my appetite.

OK, now I AM going to barf.

I would've had a huge hissy-fit right there. Yelling. Manager. Health Dept. Willamette Week. CitySearch. Etc.

Post Office box keys are the best for caramel collecting. They're long, thin and have a sharp ridge at just the right angle to scrape all the caramel off with one twist!

(How do I know? I grew up in a family of hillbillies, but escaped!)

Before putting on my shoes and socks, I take a sock and run it between each of my toes on both feet. Wife thinks it's bizzaro, but feels good. It's been a habitual ritual for me since I was a kid.

Not as juicy as ear wax, but there it is.

I'll second the PO box key.

(I too escaped!)

[High five to Skep]

I had no idea that I was in posession of such valuable items! I'm going to go "dig them out" and distribute at our next love-in.

And the sock thing is funny!

Edselehr, I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one who does this! Maybe not everyday, but it does feel good!

Gets rid of the toe jam too!

From Come Together by the Beatles:

He wear no shoeshine, he got toe-jam football
He got monkey finger, he shoot coca-cola
He say "I know you, you know me"
One thing I can tell you is you got to be free
Come together right now over me

[high five back to kskd!]

Okay, moving along now...

One of my little odd habits is, when I'm eating in a restaurant, and I have any food that I handle with my hands (sandwich, hamburger, fries, etc) immediately after finishing said food I HAVE to go wash my hands. Multiple times, until I get the food smell off. My wife knows this well of course, and just looks at me waiting for it as soon as I finish the last bite.

(chirp, chirp, cricket sounds...)

What?? No one else does this?

I always like to wash my hands after eating.

I cannot have any syrup on my eggs, potatoes or meat-like food. Pancakes, waffles, or french toast with syrup have to be served on their own plate.

But at least I'm not one of those people who can't have the foods touching each other on the plate.

Another odd one for me; When I get a newpaper out of a paper box (like Oregonian, WWeek), I ALWAYS take the second one down in the stack. Never the top one.

Why? I have no idea.

This self-examination stuff is starting to feel strange.

I do that!

I believe the ones on the top have been fingered, are damaged, coupons and inserts missing, etc..

Think about it. Some bozo sneezes into their hands, snags the paper, decides the headline is not worth their time and leaves a germ bomb for the next sucker that comes along.

Go deep for the untouched, prime paper. Real Deep, but not the one at the bottom. It's hosed up too.

I do the same thing too! And never the second copy. Deeper as well. Same with magazines.

HerrB will now insist it's a ham-fisted pink-around-the-gills socialist-commie lib trait.

I use the back of guest towels in bathrooms when using the bathroom at a house that isn't mine...JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE PROBABLY DOES.

You actually use them? I hate to mess them up. Air dry, unless it's a relative.

If I can do it, I like to use a paper towel to open the door on a public bathroom door when exiting so I don't touch it with my hand.

paper towel to open public restrooms here too. if there is no trash can handy, I either aim for a 3 pointer or toss it on the floor if a basket isn't in sight.

freddie's way ahead of everyone else with trash cans right next to the potty door. Wendy, McD's Arby's et al, take note.

Public bathrooms don't count.

It's everyone for themselves in there.

Okay missing, your description has convinced me to dig a bit deeper into the stack! Yuck!

You will thank me for it!

Another one for me is grabbing the milk from the back, just because I can. Usually it gets consumed well before the front row date too, but I do it anyway --just because I can.

Grocery expert here.

If the dairy case is loadable from the back, the milk in the back WILL be fresher. On the other hand, if the dairy case is loadable only from the front, chances are the milk in the front is fresher as anyone stocking milk will tell you "rotating" the stock is a pain in the butt. The lower the payscale level store (that's you plaid pantry), the more likely soon-to-expire product is found in the back.

Wow! I'm glad that I'm not the only one who;
Takes a newspaper from the middle of the stack, takes a magazine from 4 or 5 back, takes milk from the back (or looks for the furthest out date)!

At Costco, Winco and Cash and Carry I ALWAYS look for the furthest out date even if I have to dig through half a dozen or so items to find it!

Now my daughter (15) does it too! My wife laughs at both of us if we're all together in the store!

I totally look at the dates. Been burned on Plaid Pantry before myself. The bastards sold me a foul burrito. Yeah, I deserve it for buying one there in the first place, but still...

I don't ever go for the nice towels. In a pinch, I'll use the TP, then flush it to hide the whole drying incident!

Fart habits anyone? Why not right? We've discussed ear wax, this cannot be outside the scope. And it's gonna be funny.

Anyone ever plan the deployment? You know the drill, locate somebody who would really appreciate it, move in then pull the Stash and Dash™! Retreat to strategic location to see how it all is received.

Or, go to the bathroom where you might get lucky and score the air fragrence, flush for appearences... Maybe walk outside, test the wind and feel really good about it?

Then there is the sporadic release! While moving, let it out a bit at a time, until it's all over. Done right, you then can look to see who noticed and who didn't without really getting implicated! Always a classy move, done right.

Finally, the cough! A loud cough, or other similar distraction can easily mask all but the apocalyptic, and or unplanned incidents. Works in a pinch.

I forgot my favorite! The exit! The ultimate Stash and Dash™! Hold it, hold it, come on, just a bit more, done, yes! Unload quick, then change environments with no looking back. This is typical in elevators. Last one off? Great, nobody will ever have to know will they? Also works wonders for that just horrible bus ride. Leave them with the gift that really is giving for a while.

At one point or another, I've pulled every one of these. I know you all have likely similar experiences. The test is do you have better ones and do you have the guts to share?

(hotel room boredom right now)

I check ALL the EGGS in the set I'm buying. For some reason, I just can't stand the idea of actually paying for a hosed up egg.

When staying at a hotel, I use at least one extra exit, and make sure my access device works to get back in. Don't know why.

elevators . . .

I'm starting to do the Alfred Hitchock thing in elevators.

See, Alfred Hitchock used to tell a story to people he accompanied in elevator to break that awkward silence.

It went like this:

"Well, anyway, there was blood all over the carpet, blood splattered all over the walls, on the ceiling. The blood soaked through the floor and was dripping into the apartment below . . ."

Around this time the elevator doors would open and hitchock would walk out with his friend leaving the rest of the people in the elevator wondering about the rest of the story.

One seen on Seinfeld went like this:

". . . so I had to kill him, and the police are still looking for me."


Okay, now back to our main topic . . .

"make sure my access device works to get back in. Don't know why"

In case you want to do the nudie mad dash down the hall and back -- you wanna make sure the key works.


ps: ever try your "key" in other motel doors? sometimes they open them! Happened to my friend who caught someone . . . unpacking his suitcase! LOL!

This might be slightly gross but I know some of you do it.
Are you ever sitting on a chair, let out a small fart, then sniff the seat? Funny how you don't mind the smell of your own gas, but when you get a whiff of someone elses gas,it makes you want to vomit.

flatulence - Pronunciation [flach-uh-luh nse] –adjective

1. For Women; An embarrassing byproduct of digestion.
2. For Men; An endless source of entertainment and male bonding.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flatulence

One of the most important parts of a good fart is the hang time! The longer it hangs, the better!

Yes, I do try the key!

Never had it work, but I am always doing this kind of thing. If anything, it's a strong case for keeping your door locked with the deadbolt!

Beano, that's like popping a zit and smelling your finger! Yuck!

Here is some interesting facts on those smelly ripper snorters AKA Farts!

Did you know?
On the average, a healthy person farts 16 times a day.
Hey guys, don't be fooled by girls who tell you that they never fart. Everyone farts, including girls. In fact, females fart just as much as males.
Many animals fart too. Cats, dogs, and cows. Elephants fart the most.
People fart the most in their sleep.
Farts that contain a large amount of methane & hydrogen can be flammable.

One of the downsides of not having a sense of smell (lost it years ago, don't know how) is that I can't smell my own, or anyone else's, farts.

I've been known to slip my wife the ol' Dutch Oven a time or two before. It usually ends up in a beating of some sort.

Bunsofsteel said; "Many animals fart too. Cats, dogs, and cows. Elephants fart the most."

What's the difference between a night club and an elephants fart?

One is a bar room and the other is a BARROOM!

Does that mean you can't taste Either brian??? Because I heard 80% of your taste is smell.

Steelass sez: "Farts that contain a large amount of methane & hydrogen can be flammable."

Hydrogen? Our body produces Hydrogen? Methane, yes, but Hydrogen? Care to google anyone? I'm on dialup tonight.

That's the odd thing Buns, I CAN taste. In fact, it's heightened.

Odd, I know.

I work downtown PDX. There are so many times I wish I'd lost my sense of smell!

I have a great grandma that is pushing 93. Sometimes when she gets up, she unconsciously lets out these giant rippers, Im talking about the loud ones that stink like sulfer, the egg smelling farts. She got in the Yugo the other day and almost blew me out of the car.
My grandma is one old FART! No pun intended!

stop feeding her junk food. she'll smell better.

Its those DAMN "Worthers Original" She eats those constantly.