Chris Taylor has often said that. It's a great idea. I find it difficult sometimes to sort out what it means. Common ground? Connecting ideas?

Well, I had a nice thought on a lunch time drive I thought I would share. (It helped me generate some marketing material too.)

There are various ideologies, and they are distributed over time. One thing I find interesting is that ideologies often see success when executed with clarity and will. This can work for a fairly flawed one too.

It takes time for all of that to work through the system, meaning at any given time we've got these competing ways and means of doing things that take a very long time to resolve.

This is complicated by the fact that often things are not done with perfect clarity, and despite will, bad stuff happens.

We then are left with some ambguity at all times. Conviction then often rules the day, because the actual metrics we have to go on are not always easily parsed and analyzed.

Muddy water, essentially.

So then, building bridges is about understanding multiple approaches to things, finding the common elements, and then extending that to form a new idea, or perhaps just refine one to fit the situation at hand.

For business, it means capturing those successes from the past, as well as really understanding where we are today and trying to not only find out what that means, but go farther and sell what it means.

For ideological things, religion, politics and such, it means having a robust set of tools from which to reason and make sense out of who we are, and to put that into the context forced upon us through the events of the day.

Our young people are innocent in that they've not been jaded. Our older people, though jaded, have seen the cycle, leaving many of us somewhere in-between, looking for a path.

And that's it really. I'll post a bit more later, specific examples that I think will spark some discussion.

The core of this, from a core people perspective, is we all need to feel good about our works, our beliefs, our successes and our path.

Advocacy is often framed as "flipping" or "turning" or "converting" people. This is where the sport is clearly, but this is where the polarization is too! With that comes a lot of thrashing that does none of us any good.

Advocacy can be a two way street, where I understand you, you understand me, and we both understand "Bob", for example. There, we gather what we have conviction on, factor in the current events of the day, then debate the strengths!

When this is done, what is left is everybody keeps those things that they feel good about, while at the same time seeing a path where they can take those things and build, or move toward a greater overall success, even though that success may be significantly different than what their experience would have them otherwise believe.

(and thanks to Ang for that bit --you know who you are!)

At the end of the day, how we work as people is seperate from our culture, our understanding, our entitlements. Those core things that make us human, are shared. Where they are ignored, marginalized, or masked by our technology, ideology and other things, we suffer in our ability to work toward an improved state for all.

Yeah, that sounds a bit commie. I don't mean it to be. What I really do mean is that you can't progress with advocacy that threatens who somebody is, unless you are also willing to deal with the aftermath of having broken them.

Better to build on who they are, and improve that instead.

Missing for me "Building a Bridge" may be just a first step in a long bridge building process. Sometimes it's just meeting the person you have major disagreements with on some common ground with a hand shake.

To start "Bridge Building" one needs put away the ego and pretentious thoughts and be willing to admit, "you know I may be wrong on this....I need to learn more from your perspective"

I can give a quick example that I think we all are experiencing on this board. I hope you all have notice how Broadway has changed his posting style. Owning up to his opinions and beliefs as his and not "preaching" at the board. I have found reading his posts much easier to digest and I feel he is actually participating in a dialogue verses a monologue. Broadway is building a good bridge. My hope is that even though we may disagree we can still reach across the table, or the bridge, shake hands and move on.

Broadway is working hard, and I sure noticed!

(good on you man!)

Broadway has, and I laud him for that. Things just go so much smoother in here when we present ourselves and our views in a not-so-bombastic, pushy way. Yeah we all have our own viewpoints, and ideas, and thoughts ... sharing them is one thing, thrusting them onto others who don't want to hear them is another, and wrong.

I have some bridge building of my own to do, within my own family. My business failed up here, my cousin/business partner/financial backing backed out of the restaurant when it came time to sign on the dotted line and assume the loan, the deal fell through, and the seller had to declare bankruptcy and include the business. So, I have a lot of animosity right now, as I pack my stuff and move back to Portland, and a lot of bridges to build. I do know that time helps heal wounds, and it will within my family, and that everything happens for a reason ... just new to this bridge-building business.

Brian--Please give me a call. Regards, Steve.

Oh man. Brian that sucks. Well, when you get to PDX, look a few of us up!

I've got a fairly nasty set with my family too. It's slow work.

This thread is turning out ok. Let's jam on this for a while.

Thanks for this, all. I've got some bridge building to do with my daughter, and I'm having trouble getting started.

Long drives thinking is a good way to begin, so thanks for that idea Missing.

They are killer!

I often do my best thinking in the car. One other tip:

If you get a sweet idea, call another phone and dump it into your voice mail. If you do it when the vision is fairly clear, you will be able to recover most of it later, when you've time to do something with it.

My two oldest burned the bridge for now! It's bitter sweet really. On one hand, outta sight, outta mind. Cool! On the other, it's all just gonna fester, making it harder later on. Ugh...

So, Warner we are in the exact same spot. I don't know how to start it with them. They are so angry, and are projecting everything on to Mrs KSKD and I. All we did was adopt and be the best people we could be.

(and that really, really chaps my ass)

The last conversation was so ugly, I fed some fuel to the fire, hoping they would burn the thing, and they did. Sometimes just really being honest, isn't the right way to go. I'm not saying lie, but I am saying perhaps a really ugly position or feeling might not remain ugly, given a chance. Best to allow for that chance, rather than let it out and have to deal with it ugly.

Now I'm here, knowing it all sucks, and that I didn't help. Hell, can't be the best person all the time can we?

I don't think so, meaning the guilt is real, but resolvable. I'm ok with that and will let it work through. (see guilt thread for that dynamic)

My plan right now is to deal with some of this stuff festering, and wait for an opening. Something will break, and I've committed to being open and ready for it and to just really try when it happens.

Maybe that starts us down the road.

With your daughter, maybe a similar thing can serve as the basis for some conversation?

>>Broadway is working hard, and I sure noticed
hey guys thanks for the great press...while not changing my ideaology I am making effort changing my tone of writing and prefacing "this is my opinion" sometimes to start of certain hot topics which have been somewhat few lately which is ok...we all know where we stand on most stuff. A thing on building bridges, when one is broken we can always attempt to build another whether in relationships or business using real love, wisdom, and brains...money helps too!

Thanks Missing, for the insight. I too believe that sometimes, honesty, especially brutal honesty, really isn't the best policy.

Better to watch for a more natural opening, and just start stepping, slowly.

One of our many parental mantra's "Choose your battles" certainly apply to many situations when raising kids.

And Broadway your insights are appreciated.

Well, kids, I am here. Sooooo ... if you're flying out of PDX, I am back at the Schmizza there as of Monday. Yeah Missing, I'd love to make the next PDXRadio get together!

Hey Brian, welcome back to StumpTown! KGON played "Anthem" from Rush today! I also heard "Mas Tequila" from Sammy this morning during M&B so I don't know if that was them or 95.5 KLOS.

Anthem, nice, a song that doesn't get much radio play .. that's going back a LONG ways. So when's the next get together boys??

Missing KSKD, your "building bridges" postings and your "get Cheney" postings are rather inconsistent.

I assume your goal would be to get Obama and the Democrat Congress diverted over to a Bush Administration witch hunt so they don't screw around with reforming health care, getting the economy going, feeding the poor and other less than worthwhile endeavors. Is that correct?

Deane, when does prosecuting criminal activity become a "witch hunt" to you? You keep saying you are not a Bush administration apologist, so why do you stay blind to the growing tide of evidence against Cheney and others?

Let's investigate. If they are innocent their vindication will give the current administration a huge black eye, something you seem to think they deserve. It's a win-win to pursue this...unless you don't want to see people on your team punished for committing crimes. That would be elitism at it's worst.

BTW, you are defining "building bridges" the same way that Republicans have been defining "bipartisanship" for years. As Limbaugh so transparently put it, "To us, bipartisanship is them being forced to agree with us after we politically have cleaned their clocks and beaten them."

Building bridges is finding commonalities and building solutions from that point, not in forcing incompatible ideologies down each others throats.

Deane, it's not a zero sum game, and you've posted this shit on the wrong thread.

Want to try again on the other one and leave this one alone?

Thought so.

Thanks